"You have your hands full."

      I suppose it is appropriate that a woman with three children should receive three standard sayings from people.  Well, here is my trifecta.  The third comment I receive at least once every time I'm in public is, "You have your hands full."

     I should preface this by saying that I'm very fortunate to have children who, nine times out of ten, behave in public.  And yes, I have witnesses if you think I am exaggerating.  I suppose this is because I have shown them if they have a major temper tantrum, I have no problem in leaving a full cart of groceries and immediately escorting them out of a store.  So, I am often puzzled when I hear this remark.

     There are some who say it in a helpful manner, as they are holding the door for our entourage to make its way through.  I smile and thank these individuals, because I don't think they mean anything by their comment.  They are so used to seeing families with no more than two children (if even that), and they believe they are helping out in some small way.  (And believe me, if you are holding the door or letting us go ahead in line, then you are a tremendous help!)

     Then there are the people who look at us in passing and make the comment, emphasizing the "you", and going about their merry way.  I've gotten to the point that I want to stop and ask them, "What do you say to the mothers of children who aren't behaving?"  I guess they just ignore those parents all together.  Maybe their comment comes from me keeping up a steady stream of banter with my children, even the baby who can't answer yet.  That may seem crazy, but it actually saves my sanity to keep them occupied with whatever wacky thing I'm going to say next.

     So, if you mean well, keep the comments coming.  If you're making this particular one because you're not sure what to say, how about complimenting my children on their good behavior instead?  And if we're having one of those "off" days, please ignore us and just keep on walking . . .

You did that with all three of them?

So, I get this question a lot, too.  "You did that with all of them?", sometimes followed with "By yourself?"  This always come from people with fewer than three children or no kids at all.

Yes, it may be a shocker, but we don't sit around at home all day long.  (This is called maintaining your sanity.)  I take my kids, by myself, to do all sorts of things such as walks, errands, museums, and petting zoos.  The above picture is from Kings Dominion, and I will freely admit that I did not tackle this trip alone.  My mother met us there, because, after all, the baby can't go on rides, and someone had to wait with her while another adult rode with the older children.  Also, while Kings Dominion is fun, it is no Disney World, with their superb customer service!

My friends who ask this question do so in a praising sort of way, saying they don't know how I manage to shower, much less go away on day trips.  Let's be honest . . . we don't take off for Natural Bridge Zoo every day, and there are times when it is virtually impossible to take a shower.  It's not all lollipops and rainbows around here.  We have our fair share of chaos, just like any other household.

The reality is, it wouldn't be fair to my older children to stay at home all the time just because there is a new baby in the house.  They still deserve to play lacrosse, go to the pool, and make huge, messy art projects.  Also, third children like to have noise around them all the time and to be on the go . . . it's what they are used to doing.  Our little one screams bloody murder if you sit around too long.  She wants to be out seeing the world and charming the next stranger we come across.

Of course, there are strangers who ask this question in a condemning tone, as if I personally affronted them by having another child and daring to take my progeny out in public.  Those are the people at whom we politely smile, wish a good day, and then ignore.